madison, cd's, and a girlfriend...?!?

yeah, that's what's up.

it's astonishing what can change in mere days,

how one line of thought turns to another

and you end up on a completely different path than what you set out on.



how the eff did that all happen?

i'm not sure, but it did.

...and the cd's are great too.

in your hands

the ball is in your hands now,

i'm going to stop pretending i have control over what happens

it's your game now, you decide what happens. 

but this doesn't mean i don't want to play too.

let's just skip today

and not let it happen. move on, nothing to see here.

perhaps tomorrow will be better....

if not, let's just skip that one too.

fuckitty fuck!

good friends

are hard to find, harder to lose

but next to impossible to forget. 

"annie said i think i'll pass away tonight, cause it seems i'll never get it right.

it's just me, it's just me, annie says.

and when you wake up, everything is gonna be fine.

i guarantee that you'll wake up in a better place and a better time.

she said forget me, just forget me, but i can't." 

-streetlight manifesto. 

-a better place, a better time. 

i can't forget you, no matter what i write. 

a little loopy

4 hours isn't enough

why can't i sleep past 8:30 in the am?

la lala lala la la fuck.

teach me how to sleep. 

please.

i don't have email!!!!

aaarrrrggghhh!!!!!

this is sort of pathetic how often i feel the need to check it, my email that is.

and now it's not working... and i need to check it!!

aaarrrrggggghhhh!!!!!

hells yeah!!

i'm going to greece.... 

not really sure it's settled into my bones yet, but hot damn! i'm going to greece!!

i can't sit still... hell, i can't even think

i'm going to greece!

adi

it doesn't exist

or at least that's my new conclusion...

                        non-fiction... fiction

non-creative... creative

                          yeah, you can't mix the two. 

creative non-fiction is just fiction with a blander story to tell.

i'm going back to bed now,

adi

bring the meter back down...

and breathe. 

                                 sudden calm has reemerged and it seems those

close to me are thankful. 

i can't say i blame them. apparently i frightened some.

                                          my bad...

though

                                               i do miss the rage

a little.

drinking in the am

shut up. fuck off. 

i need this

no, that isn't directed toward you sarah.

atoms

like a nucleus, i'll circle around

                                              proton, neutron, electron

at the perimeter, yet never fully dislodged from that center.

i am positive, neutral, negative energy at all times.

                                               my positive will entice your laughter

your negative will encourage my apathy

                        and a mutual misunderstanding will provoke my insatiable wrath. 

                        and still there will  be laughter

and there will still be apathy

and still, like a nucleus 

i'll circle in cycles 

              of plus, minus, and 

wish i may, wish i might

spill a secret i shouldn't 

tonight

inspiration in a bottle

hell, it worked for faulkner, didn't it? 

all glasses are the same, it's what you put in it.

that's a lie, my glass is not that dry. it even has an etched in label on it.

says gentleman, jack. 

so come here jack, we're gonna be gentlemen 

and chill tonight.

candy-jack chicken

tried a new... recipe... i guess you could call it. thought it was pretty good. needed more jack though. perhaps a marinade? 

boneless chicken breast

cinnamon 

brown sugar

gentleman jack (haven't tried the other kinds, though i doubt there'd be much flavor difference)

vegetable oil

thought about a molasses glaze at the end, but i'm not sure how that'd be. kind of scared to try that one... perhaps this weekend? not to mention it's so messy. but according to my nasal cavity, it should mix with the brown sugar and cinnamon nicely. we'll see. 

i'm hungry again... :(

i need a drink

... and a vacation. 

great. and it's only the first week of the semester... 

i'm gonna go murder a dude-bro now. 

be back in 10.

school

ugh... i don't want this. 

i have a feeling this semester is going to be an opaque hell. 

woo.